urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:cem_1211 Carolyn Carolyn 2004-09-18T05:50:00Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:cem_1211:1333 2004-09-18T05:50:00Z 2004-09-18T05:50:00Z Dear Journal,<br /><br />I have been so drained of energy since IM'ing Eric. I can't ever seem to get enough sleep and I go through my day in a daze. My mind is cloudy and out of focus. <br /><br />Poetry is impossible. My mind is dry and I can't seem to think of anything but how sleepy/sad/confused I am. <br /><br /><br />Can't think of anything more to write...<br /><br /><br />CEM luvs EAM urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:cem_1211:1158 2004-07-08T00:20:10Z 2004-07-08T00:20:10Z You are a ghost wandering through my mind<br />A memory of what has been<br />A part of me I wish I could leave behind <br />But I continue to be haunted from the inside<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />*Tell me what you think... it's not finished though*<br /><br />~CEM<br /><br />P.S. CAROLYN STILL LOVES ERIC urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:cem_1211:906 2004-07-07T22:35:01Z 2004-07-07T22:35:01Z Dear Journal,<br /><br />Eric looks so sad... I'm torn in two. I spent the night before past at home. Carol told me that she talked to Eric about finding another place. She took my keys back. I slept none when I was at home. Sleep isn't an option right now. He is torn up and I can't sleep knowing that he won't let me be there for him like I had promised. Last night I let him in and it was like it wasn't Eric I let in... It was like I let a sad stranger in. I feel like he is pushing me away and I think im dying from the inside because of the hurt I see on his face. I wrote him a note and left it where he could find it.. I hope he will let me comfort and tell him how much I love him. He is my other half and right now I am torn apart from the inside. <br /><br /><br />CAROLYN LOVES ERIC<br /><br />~CEM urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:cem_1211:715 2004-06-07T20:24:23Z 2004-06-07T20:24:23Z I have been spending so much time with Eric lately. Since the fire we have gotten so much closer. I worry so much about where he is gonna live and work. I think he is mad at me. Mom and I were supposed to take him downtown and check out the Red Cross shelter. He backed out and he said that he would be okay living in his car and I won't believe it. I said "If that's what you wanna do" and he hung up on me. He is probably so pissed at me right now. I am so confused as to how he could lose all hope for himself. He can live in a shelter for a short while until he can get a job. He has lost all hope and I haven't been able to convince him otherwise. He has been so sad and I feel horrible because I should be able to cheer him up. And always fail...<br /><br />*CEM luvs EAM*<br /><br />Carolyn urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:cem_1211:470 2004-05-23T03:18:29Z 2004-05-23T03:18:29Z hello! this my first entry, abby had to show me how to use this, cuase she is a genius and the most awesome person ever... ok yah abby is typeing this, shut up